memories of christmas

as the christmas is near...near as in 1 night away, i cant help but to think about the philippines where i grew up! as this time of the year comes ofcourse it is exciting for me.
I remember when we were still all in the philippines, i live in a compound where it is all my family in my father side where me and my sisters actually grew up together with my cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandmas... every christmas eve where the noche buena is happening all some of us go to church to hear mass and others will stay for the preparation of the noche buena. in our compound there are 6 houses and where all my immidiate relative from my father side lives including us family, and what we do is for noche buena is every house has an asigned or we call "toka" for food, and as everyone prepares for the course & deserts we kids are so exicited for the night. then after the mass we go home and eat noche buena with the whole family under the mango tree where everything is already set up... the food, drinks, deserts, the christmas sounds, lights and ofcourse the gifts. yes, we all gather up and put out the food under the mango tree and share it like there is a birthday party. well, the best thing is ofcourse the exchange gifts for the adults and for us kids we are waiting for the games...yup! games as in like brthday games where there is "paluglugan" and the jackpot will be in the middle of it! yeah!!! awesome isnt it?! well thats how we celebrate our christmas eve way back when we were younger but now everybody is gone in pinas and who was left there was my 2 grandmas...sad...wish that i can experience it again oneday, wish that everyone whos here will come home again in pinas for the holidays and we all celebrate it again as we use to celebrate it before!
i missed everything there in pinas! i missed the fun and memories of mhy childhood and the way of living there, the places where we used to go and the things that we used to do! i really do feel the homesickness for a long time now eventhough i had my vacation there couple of months ago...still not the same as it was used to be! i missed everything. i know now for sure everything will be different eventhough we all decided to go back home for the holidays for the reason that couple of my relatives who already passed away but like we all say that if theres loss there will be new life...and for that all the addition to my family is my son, my ate's kids, and my cousin's kids. And for me, i want my son to experience what is the meaning of christmas in pinas! just remembering my childhood christmas makes me happy yet a tears flowing from me! i just missed my life there!